3/24/2025

Lately I keep thinking each passing day is going to be the day I break the habit chain and not post but here I am. Sometimes it feels really silly to have a journal or even a website. I swung back into that discontent cycle - then I think about all that I have experienced, advocacy and where I want to go. Not necessarily where I want to go but where life is going to unfortunately evolve - given the nature of our world. This daily political media chaos? Is truly going to shape what we expect out of leaders one day.

We're not there yet.

One of the biggest problems with writing/media is the lack of emotional distance depth. Most writers aren't skilled in nonverbal communication. It's something many cannot even conceive exists much less successfully incorporate into their 'art'.

In grief you hear this phrase all the time: no words to describe and that's true. Moments of grief inspire raw unshakable fear as someone is forced to confront unwanted horror inserted into their lives. They become speechless.

Yet there are humans who are naturally speechless. They do not inspire horror. They inspire a person to dig deeper and pay more attention to them and their surroundings/environment. I know this - I'm a parent of a nonverbal child who is blind with hearing deficits. It's exhausting but I take nothing for granted.

Idk. I've experienced a significant amount of grief in my life where I know it's possible to reach a point where no words could possibly describe the moment. I've also experienced over 15 years of life as a parent in a nonverbal world but it's also my career. It's easy for me to navigate the full spectrum of 'nonverbal'. As such, I have a higher than normal attention span.

For that reason? I know that traditional media structures aren't effective. Those with nonverbal immersion expertise hold something else: instructional control. If I didn't actually hold or develop this skill I wouldn't be able to communicate with my son or any of my clients. Instructional control is not easy to develop. It takes a certain kind of personality to wield these abilities. It's also why there is such a shortage and burnout in caregivers.

I don't know where I'm going with this tonight but quite simply the current politicians aren't holding or wielding instructional control. They're whimsically amused by unpredictable chaos while not being able to provide instruction and that does not make for a successful leadership model. It'll catch up to them one day.

In another life I could have been a political strategist or a consultant but in this one? I'm just a tired mom. I'm going to go enjoy the rest of my night as it was a long day but a good one.