Reshaping habits is hard. Finding ways to make it fun? Critical.
I really do enjoy self challenges. Was better when I had an accountability partner. It gets old being alone all the time. Most of the day I just wanted to dive back into fiction writing. I woke up with a new idea and ran with it. Of course not sitting down and writing, it's far better to let those kinds of creativity bursts stew. Plus it was the weekend and I had so much life prep to do. But that's the great thing about fiction writing, it's possible to multitask real life and 'dream' at the same time. I've been doing this process for years. Now all I have to do is take a couple of coded notes and reflect back. At some point I realized that PTSD caused me to have an extremely vivid memory flow.
I like to play with memory enhancements and recall. It's hard to describe but after going through a mental breakdown I became aware of so many unusual things - about triggers, patterns and emotional coding. It fascinates me. The internal process.
Anyway, it's late tonight and instead of writing I'd much rather play Animal Crossing. I need to have some fun.
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